The Utter Absurdity of Bureaucracy
When Bicycles Become Bureaucratic Nightmares
Ah, East Brunswick, where the simple act of riding a bicycle is transformed into a bureaucratic odyssey of epic proportions. Forget the days when hopping on your two-wheeler was a carefree activity. No, in this town, it’s a journey through forms, inspections, and a Kafkaesque dance with the Department of Public Safety. Let’s dive into the sheer ridiculousness of the bicycle registration process, because, apparently, a child’s bike ride around the block is serious business.
The Overzealous Purpose: Protecting the World from Rogue Bicycles
You might think the purpose of a bicycle registration code is simply to ensure kids are safe while riding their bikes. But oh no, the intent of this chapter is so much more grandiose. It’s about establishing a “means of identifying the owners of bicycles and violators of this chapter.” Because nothing screams public safety like making sure little Timmy’s tricycle is properly documented and tracked.
Registration Required: Because Who Doesn’t Want Another DMV-Like Experience?
Who knew that in East Brunswick, you can’t even ride a bike without first submitting to the bureaucratic maze of registration? Yes, you heard that right—no bicycle shall be operated unless it has been registered and bears a registration tag. God forbid we allow an unregistered bicycle to terrorize the peaceful streets of East Brunswick. Imagine the horror of an unidentified Schwinn whizzing by without a tag!
The Application Process: Just Like Filing Taxes, but for Your Kid’s Bike
So, you’ve accepted your fate and decided to register your bike. What’s next? Well, you’ll need to submit an application to the Department of Public Safety, detailing the name of the manufacturer and, wait for it, the serial number of the bicycle. Because if there’s one thing we’ve all been clamoring for, it’s more paperwork in our lives. Who knew riding a bike could be as complicated as applying for a mortgage?
The Great Bicycle Inspection: Ensuring Your Bike Meets the Unachievable Standards
But the fun doesn’t stop there. Before you can get that coveted registration tag, your bike must undergo a rigorous inspection. That’s right, folks—your bike will be scrutinized to ensure it’s not in a “state of disrepair” or, heaven forbid, has a “mechanical defect.” Because we all know the real menace to society is a bike with a squeaky chain or a slightly bent spoke.
The Annual Renewal: Like Christmas, but with More Paperwork
If you thought registering your bike was a one-time ordeal, think again. The registration is good for one year—just enough time for you to forget how painful the process was before you have to do it all over again. And yes, that means another inspection. Because bikes change so much over the course of a year, don’t they? It’s only natural to assume that your trusty old bicycle could suddenly become a deathtrap.
The Silliness of It All
In conclusion, East Brunswick’s bicycle registration code is a shining example of how to take something simple and turn it into a bureaucratic nightmare. It’s as if the town council sat down one day and said, “How can we make life more complicated for everyone?” And lo and behold, they succeeded. So, next time you think about taking a leisurely bike ride, remember the hoops you’ll have to jump through, and maybe, just maybe, consider walking instead.
