Our Unofficial Yet Proud Title
It’s official, unofficially official, or just plain old gossip-worthy news: Jasmine Fresco, East Brunswick’s very own queen of subtweets, has crowned Eyes On EB with the prestigious title of #GossipRag. And you know what? We absolutely agree with her!
From Humble Beginnings to Gossip Gold
What started as a quaint attempt to keep the lovely residents of East Brunswick informed has evolved into the town’s top source for the juiciest secrets and the most delicious drama. Once merely a mild-mannered reporter, Rob W ascended to become East Brunswick’s biggest yenta. “I didn’t choose the yenta life, the yenta life chose me,”
The Art of Yenta-ing
Rob has unearthed not just one or two, but many clandestine meetings this week alone, each supposed to be quieter than a silent disco at the library. “It’s as if our town officials have never heard of a whisper,” Rob remarks. “You’d think they’d catch on after the third exposé.”
Meanwhile, Jasmine Fresco made her proclamation amid a fiery exchange over how the BOE president managed a cunning feat of manipulation. “Eyes On EB? More like Eyes Everywhere in EB! They know everything. If that’s not a #GossipRag, I don’t know what is!” she declared, all the while scratching her head in bewilderment over how Rob gets his info and anxiously pondering what else he might uncover.
The Love for Drama
Let’s face it, East Brunswick residents can’t get enough of the drama. Whether it’s various secret meetings or someone putting their garbage cans facing the wrong way and not wheels to the curb, Eyes On EB is there, binoculars in hand, and ears to the ground. “If there’s drama, we’re there. We might even bring popcorn,” Rob adds with a wink.
The Future of Eyes On EB
As for the future, Rob W sees endless potential. “This town is a goldmine of stories. Just yesterday, I heard a rumor about a high-level elected official being caught up in.”
In the spirit of good fun and a little neighborhood nosiness, we at Eyes On EB embrace our #GossipRag title. After all, if you’re going to live in a fishbowl, why not make it the most interesting fishbowl around?
So, dear readers, keep those tips coming. Rob W and the Eyes On EB team will be here, notepad in one hand, tea in the other, ready to document every flip and flop in our beloved East Brunswick. As Jasmine Fresco says, “If you don’t want it in Eyes On EB, then don’t do it in EB!”
Remember, you heard it here first — unless Rob W heard it at Panera.
